Where we try and help you win some coin. But remember kids, gambling is wrong. We would never actually bet real money (wink, wink)

Thursday, September 04, 2003


Air Force at Northwestern (+8)
Northwestern has not shown it can stop the run, and that's what the Air force does with frightening proficeincy. Give the points. AFA

Auburn at Georgia Tech (+8.5)
Auburn was overpowered by one of the best teams in the country. Georgia Tech was overpowered by BYU. Auburn should absolutely roll over the Jackets. AUBURN

Baylor at North Texas (-15.5)
North Texas will win, but I'm not sure if they will even score 15 points. Both offenses are just inept. So don't expect UNT to cover. UNT.

*Boston College at Penn State (-10)
Penn State looked terrible against Temple, and people are underrating Wake Forest. BC lost to a team that's been to two straight bowl games, and they really should have won. I'd take BC straight up. BC.

Bowling Green at Purdue (-10)
This is the best team in the MAC, but Purdue is a top tier Big Ten team. It won't be a walk, but Purdue has enough weapons to hold off the Eagles. But don't expect a blowout. BGSU

*BYU at USC (-22)
Yes, the Trojans are one of the best teams in the country, and we predicted them to beat Auburn last weak. But part of that win was due to simply atrocious Auburn play-calling. BYU won't be as accomodating and should at least pass with some effeceincy. They lose by about two touchdowns, enough to cover. BYU

Colorado State at California (-2)
Cal's big win was a shocker, but let's not get ahead of ourselves. Colorado needed a 400-yard game from a guy who had never started before to hold off the Rams. CSU's still a real good team. CSU

*Florida at Miami (-14)
Berlin still looks shaky. miami is loaded everywhere, but for all of the focus on Florida's QBs, we should worry about Miami's situation. The Canes will win, they have too much talent to lose this game, but it'll be closer than we think. UF

Indiana at Washington (-24)
Indiana lost to UConn. UCONN! By a lot. Washingto gets to take out some frustrations. WASH

Kent State at Pittsburgh (-30)
We're on the Pittsburgh bandwagon, but Kent ain't that bad. KENT

LSU at Arizona (+12)
Arizona shut down UTEP. Whoopee. LSU's still struggling to find a QB, but I don't think the Cats will be able to move the football at all. LSU

Marshall at Tennessee (-19)
This isn't last year's Herd squad. They shouldn't be able to hang with the Vols, who are fresh off a destruction of Fresno. TENN

Maryland at Florida State (-14)
FSU is playing with a chip on their shoulder right now, while Maryland is in disarray. It looks like a carbon copy of last year's game, an FSU blowout. FSU

*Mississippi at Memphis (+8)
Memphis always plays SEC teams close. If Ole Miss struggled with Vandy, they'll struglle with Memphis. MEMPHIS

Missouri at Ball State (+14)
Do you believe Ball St has the athletes to contain Brad Smith? Neither do I. MIZZOU

*NC State at Wake Forest (+7)
Wake wins games by playing mistake-free football, but NC State just has way too much talent. They are the most loaded team in the ACC. Ask yourself, would you take FSU with a 7-point line? NCSU

Nevada at Oregon (-22)
They couldn't put away a bad Mississippi State team, so they should let Nevada hang around as well. And Nevada is passing team, and Oregon still has a porous pass defense. NEVADA

New Mexico at Texas Tech (-13)
Texas Tech wil pass at will, New Mexico will run at will. UNM should be able to stay within two touchdowns by continually scoring. UNM

Oklahoma at Alabama (+7.5)
Oklahoma doesn't have much offense, but they have a killer D. Bama poured it on late against South Florida, but OU is no South Florida. A big defensive touchdown puts it out of reach. OU

Rutgers at Michigan State (-19)
MSU failed to cover agianst Western Michigan, barely winning the game. Rutgers is on a roll, actually winning a game. MSU wins, but they don't appear capable of a blowout right now. RUTGERS

San Jose State at Stanford (-14)
SJSU played one hell of a game again Florida, eh? STANFORD

Syracuse at North Carolina (+3)
The Cuse is a big unknown, but UNC is a known: they stink. CUSE.

UCLA at Colorado (-3)
Colorado suddenly has a passing game and they are playing at home. I really like UCLA, but I'm pretty sure Klatt is for real, so we need to adjust our opion of the Buffs. CU

UNLV at Kansas (+11)
The Rebels are a much better team and should win going away, but they are also one of the most undisciplined teams in the nation. Stupid plays should keep Kansas in it. Take the home dog and hope UNLV chokes it. KANSAS

Utah at Texas A&M (-9)
A&M struggled against the vaunted Arkansas St. Indians. They shouldn't giuve 9 points to anybody right now. UTAH

Virginia at South Carolina (+3)
I'd stay far away from this game. Corey Schaub is hurt, so UVa is missing their top offensive player, but USC barely beat ULL. Bet the under. UVA.

Washington State at Notre Dame (-6)
Wazzu didn't play all that well against Idaho, and Notre Dame may lack big play ability, but they are a solid, tough team. Playing at home. N DAME

Wyoming at Oklahoma State (-20)
Someone must pay. Wyoming doesn't have near the defense that Nebraska does, and are in fact one of the worst teams in Division I. OSU should score a ton of points. OSU

Tuesday, September 02, 2003

As promised, Father Mushroom:

Dear Stephen and Fans,

OUCH! Well, weekend one is come and gone, and were were a disappointing 1-3 ATS, but did manage to go 2-2 SU, which is not enough reason to send up the white smoke either.

Let this serve as a reminder to you that this is "for entertainment purposes only." But are we giving up? NO! We've adopted a new stragegy here at Vatican North: We are concentrating on LIBERAL SCHOOLS that deserve our loyalty (did you notice the only team that covered for us Saturday was Cal-Berkeley? If that isn't a sign from above, I don't know what is.) So, with our new criteria, here are the liberal schools we like this week. Take the line, whatever it is...liberal always triumphs over good, and FoxNews hasn't infiltrated the odds-making business anyway...yet....

USC over BYU. In California, so BYU's "rare air" in the mountains will not be a factor. Neither will their fundy fans or their defense. The amount of cheap wine, beer, herbal refreshments being consumed in the stands--and beautiful co-eds in tiny-tees-- will send many of the BYU players over the edge. This one's easy. USC 49 BYU 12.

Iowa over Buffalo. Iowa City is the liberal heart of a state in the "Heartland." Fr. Mushroom has been treated like royalty there on several visits. Iowa looked great in game one--look for a similar romp. Iowa 52 Buffalo 8.

New Mexico at Texas Tech. Every team in Texas is overrated (just like their politicians.) We have adopted New Mexico is one of our new favorite teams, as they have a woman placekicker--who yesterday became the first woman ever to score points in a Division 1A game! We like enlightened, equal opportunity schools. The Lobos will be getting a bunch of points, which they will cover if they don't win outright. Sending good karma southward, I'm going to say New Mexico 21 Texas Tech 20--with an extra point being the margin of victory.

UNLV vs. Kansas. Sin City vs. the right-wing's beloved "Heartland." Bob Dole vs. Bartcop. Escorts vs. Fundy Preachers. What's not to like in this one? UNLV has a real team and an offense that can move the ball. Final score from Vegas: UNLV 33 Kansas 7.

Minnesota vs. Troy State. At Fr. Mushroom's alma mater, the more things change the more they stay the same. The Gophers still schedule creampuffs for their non-conference games (Troy State won 1 game last year, and score 5 ponts yesterday...huh?) Gophers can actually move the ball this year. This is today's easiest pick of the bunch. Final from Sinneapolis: Minnesota 56 Troy State 14.

Peace to all of you. And keep sending those winnings to Bart so he can grow the hammer higher.

Monday, September 01, 2003

Father Mushroom made some picks but I didn't get them up in time. But I will get you his Week Two picks.

As for my picks, I went 18-11 and 3-2 in my starred matchups. Since no one has the bankroll to bet 30 games a week, it's probably more fair to judge me on my starred games. But I am assuming that I'm betting $100/game with a 10% vig. So, in Week One, if you had followed my advice, you would have:

Starred matchups only
Bet $550, won $600. Turn a $50 profit.

All matchups
Bet $3190, won $3600. Turn a $410 profit.

I'll keep a running tab throughout the seaon:
18-11, +$410
3-2, +$50

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